It Takes A Village

This post has been bouncing around in my head for the past six months. Having two daughters get married in the space of a little over a year meant that we needed a lot of help with wedding-related things between April of 2020 and April of 2021. I was particularly thankful for the help we received leading up to Emily and Ben's wedding. Because Covid was a little more under control this spring, they were able to have more guests than Madison and Carson did which meant more to plan and prepare and, for me, more stressful feelings. There is no way we could have pulled off either event without the help of some wonderful friends and family members. Six months out from Emily and Ben's big day, here's my list of the many, many people who made it possible for everything to go so well. I'm probably forgetting some people, so if you're not mentioned here just know that my prayers were full of gratitude for you in the weeks before and after the wedding. 

Ben's parents JD and Tiffany were so gracious and helpful and were right there helping with planning and executing every step of the way. They've had four other sons already get married and thought of things that I wouldn't have. Plus they were super organized, which I always appreciate. I'm grateful to know that Emily has such fun, loving, and welcoming in-laws. 

My sister Becca and her husband Louis are always willing to pitch in and help out. We decided to do most of the food for the reception ourselves, which may have been a little too much to take on but was such a cost savings that there was no other option. Becca and Louis took part of that off my plate by purchasing the fruit and then making all of the fruit salad for the reception. They also let us take some big tree trunk sections from work they were doing in their yard to use for table decorations.

Jared's mom and dad helped us make batch after batch of pasta salad. It was a lot of cooking pasta, measuring pesto and parmesan, chopping basil, plus mixing, mixing, and mixing some more. Having so much help with that was a lifesaver. I know it was a sacrifice for both of them to travel to Utah to be there for Emily and Ben. 

Brother Williams, who owns a food truck and lived in the neighboring ward, offered us his expertise and advice on cooking for a crowd, alerted me to a screaming good deal on the meat we needed for the pulled pork sandwiches, and let us use his catering equipment to serve the food at the reception. 

Carson's mom Shelley helped Samantha make the wedding cake. Shelley is the best and I miss being able to meet up for lunch or head to their place for a bonfire and games. Both of our girls have been blessed with amazing in-laws. She came over the day before to help Sam assemble the layers and then came early to the reception to get it all put together with the finishing touches. As a side note, she also let us borrow her cake-making tools a few weeks later so Samantha could make Laura and Connor's wedding cake. 

Ben's brothers and sisters-in-law were busy helping all evening. They took turns manning the dessert table and dishing up the delicious bar cookies from Great Harvest. Personally, I was partial to the lemon bars. Ben's older brother was the DJ and he created a playlist full of fun music to keep the party going all evening.

Val is the person everyone needs in their lives. I mean, she set Emily and Ben up on their first date! Seriously though, Val is the woman to ask if you need help with anything. She is either related to or knows someone who can help you answer any question or solve any problem. Val's mom and sister loaned us their electric roasting pans to keep food warm at the reception, her brother used his woodworking skills to turn those tree trunks into large wood slices to use as the best for the centerpieces, her sister-in-law did Emily's hair, and I probably should have used her printer suggestion as well. She was generally a good sounding board for me through the two months between Ben and Emily getting engaged and the wedding day. That's something I truly needed.  

Speaking of Val knowing everyone, she's the one who told me that Jill Coombs, a sister in our ward, did flower arranging and could possibly help with wedding flowers. Jill was so sweet and kind. She had Emily and Ben over to talk about what they were envisioning and they made a plan together. All we had to do was go and purchase the flowers from the wholesale florist. The completed bridal bouquet as well as all the bridesmaid flowers and boutonnieres were beautiful. They were miles better than the "maybe we can do the flowers ourselves" practice bouquet Emily and I made at home. 

Bethany and Anthony - transporting the cake from our place to the reception, setting up beforehand, unloading and reloading cars, cleaning up afterward, anything and everything we needed they were there to do. They just kept seeking me out and asking what else they could help with. It was hugely helpful and something we didn't plan for at all but we couldn't have made things work without them. I already loved Bethany, but this just solidified her spot as an honorary Moran daughter :)  

Bethany and Anthony had a wedding of their own this July! 

Sam and Abby were our door greeters. As two girls who aren't always the most extroverted, it was a lot to ask them to chat up all the guests and then take their pictures with an instant camera for the photo guest book. Instead of eating, socializing, or dancing, they spent the majority of their time being our welcome committee. 

Sweet Laura, our bonus child and everyone's favorite Brazilian sister. Like Val, Laura was a good sounding board for me. I know she was for Emily as well based on the nights I could hear them giggling in their bedroom well past midnight. While we were planning Emily and Ben's wedding, Laura was planning her wedding to Connor just a month later. It was definitely all wedding all the time for a few months. Laura was there to listen to ideas, help stuff and address invitations, and do Emily's wedding day makeup. 

My instinct at a crowded social event is to find a job to keep me busy. It makes me feel less nervous when I have something else to focus on and if I'm serving food or washing dishes or clearing tables or whatever I don't have to make small talk. However, we had a receiving line at the reception and I kind of had to be in the line. It would have been strange had I not been, right? So there was no way for me to busy myself with kitchen tasks even though they legitimately needed to be done. Tiffany's siblings and their families were the back-of-house helpers with food at the reception. They kept the platters filled and the kitchen clean and basically made sure everything went smoothly. 

While Jared and I were standing in the receiving line for hours and hours making small talk and thanking everyone for coming it became painfully clear to me that even though the place was packed, most of the guests were there for the groom and not the bride. And that makes sense given that Ben grew up in Utah and Emily did not. Of course, we had my extended family there as well as Jared's parents and several of Emily's friends from her mission. But I would say that at least 80% of the people I talked with that night were friends of the Packards. That's awesome and I'm grateful they were there. Still, I still couldn't help feeling a little sad and friendless at times that night. 

When I would feel that way I just had to look across the room to Scott and Esther Swasey also knows as our superfriends. While we lived in Utah I would meet up with Esther every so often to go walking and talk about life. It was one of the things that kept me moving forward while Jared and I were apart. About a month before the wedding we were walking and talking about what we'd planned so far and what still needed to happen. One of those things was finding someone to serve food at the reception, which I planned to possibly have bridesmaids and groomsmen do in shifts or maybe even hiring some of the young women from our ward to do. Esther did not hesitate to volunteer herself and Scott to be there and fill that role for the ENTIRE evening. They showed up before the reception started and stayed until everything was cleaned up at the end of the night. Our transient military life has blessed us with many friends that we love but don't get to see all that often. Having just those two dear people there went a long way toward making up for all those who couldn't be. 

I'm so very grateful for the village we had around us as we celebrated Emily and Ben and the beginning of their eternal family. Happy six months to the Packards!